


Night Is Alive

by Lazarus76



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Eating Disorders, F/M, Recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-29 18:11:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6387205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lazarus76/pseuds/Lazarus76
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Final part of a trilogy - This Empty Love and Heart of Fire. </p><p>Hux is delighted you're re-discovering food. You're re-discovering Hux.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Night Is Alive

Its been seven weeks since they found you collapsed at work.

Seven weeks of Hux's gentle encouragement, caring consideration, and meals.

He's not tried to force feed you, or insist you eat. The nightmares you had of him shouting at you or trying to make you sit to meals never came true. He's encouraged you at every step.

"Have another spoonful," he's said, when you've cleared half your plate. And over time, its got easier. "Have another spoonful," he'll say, and before you know it, you've eaten three quarters.

Its all healthy food. Pasta, careful meat dishes, vegetables. He's not encouraging of making you eat sugar - "empty rubbish, you need to build muscle" - and he also doesn't get annoyed when you feel you cannot eat any more. If anything, he simply nods. "Well done," he'll say.

You have noticed one thing though. He seems to genuinely enjoy cooking. "I like taking care of you," he says simply, when you're both slumped in the living room.

You kiss him on the cheek. "Thank you."

His hand is on your thigh. He's rubbing it, invitingly. You like it, but you still feel uneasy. You've not really felt comfortable being naked in front of him for months. You had that wonderful night three weeks ago, but he mostly held you, talking and whispering.

You blink. Hux is in danger of turning into your carer and your nursemaid - the thought makes you shudder. You need to show him its still a partnership, and your insecurities will not continue to disrupt your life.

You love him. You turn and look at him, admiring his profile. He turns to you. "Penny for them?"

You smile. "Hux, I love you."

"Why thank you." He pulls you close. "And I love you too. Especially now I feel I can hug you without breaking you."

"You really do prefer me with curves, don't you?"

He sighs. "I do. I'll be frank - I was talking about you to Kylo last week. He asked how you were, and I said getting better." He looks slightly guilty.

"And?"

"I, er," Hux is losing his poise. "I then said, 'but I loved it when we met, and she was a bit plumper. Buxom.'" He's playing with your hair. "Yes. Buxom. Rather than becoming skeletal."

Now you are blushing. "And what did Kylo say?"

"Well, he tried to lecture me on how I shouldn't objectify you, but frankly, I wasn't listening. I hated you getting so thin, and when I and Phasma had to get you into bed when we collected you, I cried. All I could see where your ribs, and where your stomach should be." Tears are forming in his eyes now. "And I do feel responsible, because I should have noticed earlier."

You kiss him. "Its not your fault. Its both of our faults." You bite your lip. "I should have talked to you."

"Indeed." He's resting his arm on your shoulders. "But I'll tell you this. I'm not going to let you waste away like that again, or let you become so insecure. You're mine. Mine. And as far as I'm concerned, perfect."

This display of possession is exciting to you. This is the forceful Hux, the one who casually orders staff around in restaurants and whose staff are secretly terrified of. You lean in close to him. "Well, I'm getting better."

"You are." He cackles and tickles your waist. "You're fattening up all the time...guess my cooking is good!"

"Careful," you say. "I might end up at 300lbs at this rate!"

"Well," he says, and he's grinning wickedly, "there would be so much for me to love!"

You playfully pick up a cushion and hit him with it. He grabs your wrists, and you lovingly wrestle.

++++++++++++++++++++++++

The next night, he's quiet. Tired. You lay next to him, with your head on his chest. His arm is round you, stroking your hair.

"Mmm," he's murmuring contentedly. "You feel so good."

You're happy to hear this. "Thank you."

"When you were ill," he says, and his voice is soft, "I was scared to grab you in the night. What if I bruised you? What if I hurt you?"

You're silent.

"I couldn't talk to you,"he says, his voice breaking slightly. "I just lay there, ignoring you, because I felt that was easier. I didn't know how to approach you. You weren't eating with me, and I couldn't tie you to a chair and force you."

"You should have tried."

He raises an eyebrow. "Yes, well, I could have asked Kylo, Rey, and Phasma to help me do that and force feed you ice cream, but I suspect we would have ended up on the evening news." He pulls you tighter. "I need logical solutions to problems, and what was happening as not logical in any shape or form. My girlfriend - my lovely, sweet, caring, gorgeous girlfriend - was starving herself to death."

You are now feeling stunned. Throughout this recovery, Hux has been closed to how he really felt. He's been encouraging and caring, but he's never fully expressed how he's been feeling. Its coming out now. You are both mortified, and grateful, that under the seemingly cold, calculating exterior lies a man with a heart.

And, as you're beginning to realise, fully red blooded. He's now stroking your arm again.

"I love lying next to you," he whispers, his breath warm. "I love the feel of soft, smooth flesh lying next to me." He's turned on to his side. "I was really lanky when I was younger. I know what its like to have bones poking out, to lie on a surface and feel it hurt." He kisses your shoulder. "I'm very glad that you are now getting that flesh back."

You are silent. His voice is fading - its obvious he's tired. As he slips into sleep, you kiss his shoulder, and start to feel stirrings of something that for a long time has lain dormant.

Desire.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

You want to show him you want him.

He's due home in half an hour. You are sitting in the lounge, waiting. He apologised for not having dinner with you, but he had a long meeting. You went out for pizza with Poe and Finn, and proudly texted him the crusts of the finished two slices.

You're waiting, casually dressed in jeans and a soft blue t shirt. You hear the scrape of his key in the lock. "(y/n)?"

"In here."

He enters, dumping his attache case. "I'm sorry I'm late, Kylo just goes on, and on-" suddenly he's silenced as you jump at him, wrapping your arms round his neck, and pressing your lips to his. He's got his arms round you, and is pulling you close.

"Well," he says, looking slightly dishevelled. "That was worth-"

"Come on."

You've got his hand, and you're leading him into the bedroom. He follows, and when you're inside, he's smirking.

"This is assertive. I did wonder when I'd see this side back."

You blush. You always used to be assertive, until your insecurities took over, and began to eat you alive. Before he can move, you've got your hands on his shoulders, and pushing him onto the bed.

"Well, well," and now he is smirking fully. "Wildcat here tonight, is she? Excellent. I wondered when."

"I figured," you mumble, straddling him, and beginning to crawl up his body, "that you deserved a reward for taking such good care of me."

"Oh, do I?" He's raising an eyebrow, but you know that he's secretly ecstatic at this. "Well, I do wonder - are you going to strip for me?"

You swallow, and pause. This is the part you've dreaded. Hux is looking at you, and you can feel the press of his desire. He tugs at your t shirt. "Take it off. Let me see you."

You begin to pull the t shirt off, over your head, and he watched, reaching up and grabbing your sides with his hands. "Yes. Gorgeous." He traces his thumbs down the sides. "Now, tell me - what do you see?"

You pause. "Well, I used to see fat, Hux. Rolls of it."

"Really?" he raises an eyebrow. "That's not what I saw. I see curves, I see a gorgeous figure that's begging for me to hold it." He's got his hands on your sides, caressing. "And I love that you are filling your bra again." And you blush. "Enough." Let's see the rest.

Now you're becoming more aroused. You slide off him, and begin to undo your jeans, as they fall, he's virtually dragging you back onto the bed.

"Those thighs," he breathes. "Perfect for wrapping round me, and keeping me where you want me." He's stroking the inner thigh. "You know what I liked when I first saw you? The muscle definition. Strong, shapely, sexy." There's a devilish look on his face now, which reminds you of when you first met, and he demanded to keep you in bed with him for the whole day. "And your arse. Oh, yes. Something for me to hold." He's now looking at you. "And I bet you think its too big, yes?"

"Yes."

"Silly." He's now flipping you over, so you're on your back, under him. "If I wanted a bag of bones lying next to me, I'd find one. The first time we had sex, do you remember how I kept demanding more?"

You do.

"Why do you think I did? I wanted you underneath me, and I just wanted to keep on holding you." He's got his hands on your hips now. "And let me guess - you think you should have no hips, right?"

"I - well-"

"I love them." He's got them tight. "I love your hourglass figure. Trust me - next formal function, you wear something that shows it and has the other women envious and the men drooling." He's grinning.

"Get undressed Hux."

"Giving me orders now?"

"Oh yes."

"Well, your wish is my command." There is a definite smirk on his face as he starts unbuttoning his shirt, letting it fall away from his shoulders. His toned muscles are revealed, and you grab his waist, pulling him on top of you.

"You know, you're a little lean," you say, carelessly. "Careful."

"Fantastic." He's on top of you again, and this time his mouth is on your neck, and near your ear. "We can both get fat together." He's sighing contentedly. "Blissful days in bed, with books, and biscuits." He sighed. "What happy, fattening days they'll be. Both of us having to be rolled out the door."

You are giggling. "Hux. I always thought you were so controlled."

He smiles. "Well, I've found someone I'm comfortable with enough to let myself go." He pulls you on top of him. "And you are utterly, utterly beautiful."

You reach out and switch off the light. "Hux?"

"Yes?"

"So are you."

Neither of you speak again that night.

You don't have to.


End file.
